Leaving tomorrow!

Here's our itinerary...
Oct 29, leave Home
Oct 30, arrive in Beijing
Oct 31 - Nov 1, sightseeing
Nov 2, fly to Nanchung
Nov 3, meet Elizabeth Jean
Nov 4 – 7, adoption process
Nov 8, Fly to Guangzhou
Nov 9-12, medical for children / free days
Nov 12 or 13, take oath at ACS
Nov 14-15, return Home

Why we chose to adopt a child ...

Many people have asked us why we chose to adopt a child. We admit it does seem kind of crazy. After all we have 4 wonderful biological children, three boys - Danny, Grant and Jimmy, and one daughter - Anne Marie, and we are very happy as a family. So let me just say that this process began a long time ago, in the oddest of places, a hospital.

Our third son, Jimmy, was born with a medical condition called hydronephrosis. A kidney condition, detected in a prenatal ultrasound, that is usually benign but may require surgery to preserve normal kidney function. It was important to determine the severity of the condition during the first few days of his life, so we made frequent trips to Cardinal Glennon Children's Hospital to do so. On one such trip, sitting in a waiting room, (for hours!) I struck up a conversation with a social worker who came in with a baby in her arms. She held an absolutely adorable little girl, not much older than my son, whose legs were casted and whose head was bandaged from the devastating abuse she had already endured. When I looked into the eyes of that beautiful little girl, something inside me stirred. I'll remember that moment forever.

Over the next 7 or so years the thought of taking a child out of a loveless situation and accepting her or him into our family forever became a reality because, as has always been his way, Larry said "Sure!" Truly this was one of the easiest decisions of our married life. It has always been so peaceful.

And now that it's finally happening we are humbled by the out-pouring of love that we've experienced through you - our family and friends - and even almost complete strangers who are moved to tears when they hear our simple story. All of this happens through the mystery of our connectedness that Jesus tells us all about in John 17: "I in them, and you in me, that they may become one." What a gift!

We are also humbled by the love we feel for our new little daughter, who we've never held yet, and confident that no matter what this presents to us, when we call on God and our friends and family for help, you'll all be there. Thank you for traveling with us on this amazing journey!

Why we chose the name Elizabeth Jean LuNian ....

It took us almost a month to pick a full name for Elizabeth. Because we were expecting an older child, we planned to keep her Chinese name as her first name and give her an American middle name that somehow honored her and her new heritage but also one that worked with her first name. So we were waiting to meet her before we chose a name.

Elizabeth is my mom's first name and Jean is Larry's mom's middle name. We lost our moms shortly before we started our adoption journey. But during the three-year wait to get our daughter, these names never seemed to fit the child that was growing in our hearts.

During the wait, we read all about naming an adopted child and how important it is to preserve her given name. Even if it were given by orphanage staff and/or the person who found her. We learned that research shows that even very young babies recognize their name when it's presented. And we learned that naming is about identity and association with her past. Choosing a new one suggests that the child's past should vanish, one more loss the child should not have to bear. We didn't want to send this message to our daughter.

We resisted the impulse to forget about all of this and just name her. But as the weeks progressed through prayer and research into the meaning of names including her Chinese name, which we at first mistakenly thought was associated with a beast, we became more comfortable with the name Elizabeth Jean LuNian. Lu Nian is her Chinese given name. And while we still have somewhat of a heavy heart about our decision, it seems right.

We will make the transition to her new name slowly and in our family we will preserve her Chinese name in a special way. Our hope is for Elizabeth Jean LuNian to hold onto her past as she grows into our family and her future. And of course, as she does so, we'll give her a chance to be part of the decision as to what she'll be called. It will be fun to see what she comes up with!

Hey! This is Grant. Here is our China Blog!

They gave us a baby...

"They gave us a baby." "They gave us a baby."  is all I could manage to whisper as I looked over the documents our Adoption Consultant had just handed us.  I couldn't believe that I was looking at our 8 month old baby.  I was shocked.  Larry was shocked.  The kids were ecstatic. 

 

She was so beautiful but she couldn't be ours?  What happened to the 4yr old we were preparing for? With Chinese lessons so we could talk to her and begin to integrate her culture into ours, ESOL meetings so we could help her learn her second language - English, Early Childhood officials consulted to insure her success in school, and books read to help her transition as smoothly as possible from an orphanage to our home.  What happened to the 4yr old we had already fallen in love with? 

 

Gone.  But not without our grieving such a tremendous loss, that we know is hard to understand.     

 

So here we are.  Tears flow freely and often as well as questions, smiles, and laughs as we count how old we'll be when she graduates from high-school, etc. etc,  Yikes!   We grieve the loss of one daughter and we long to fall in love with another 14.5 pound, 26 in long, 8 month old gift, who looks amazingly like our son Grant did at that age, if you can believe it.  The journey continues.